Gifts
(The Edge of Seventeen Remix)

Author: Hope

Original Story: Gifts by Pearl-o

Summary: Clark turns seventeen.

Rating: PG

Fandom: Smallville

A few balloons wavered limply as Lex parked in the drive separating the Kent's house from the barn. Moonlight turned all vivid things pale, and the balloons stretched out on their tethers when Lex climbed from the car and brushed past them.

Letting himself into the barn, Lex kept his gaze high; he watched light flicker upstairs in the loft, he could hear the old wood creaking and settling. Of course Clark was awake- Lex wouldn't have made the drive if he'd thought otherwise- but it was a relief to have his suspicions confirmed.

As he mounted the steps, Lex slipped a hand into his pocket. Rough ribbon and inexpertly applied tape bit at the tips of his fingers- Lex had convinced himself that wrapping a gift was merely a matter of proper algebra and geometry. He'd measured the paper, calculated the exact amount of ribbon he'd need, but still created a package more at home in the hands of a first grader than business tycoon.

On the third try, Lex gave up- deciding that Clark would appreciate the effort, if not the aesthetic effect. Through rough beams, Lex smiled at the picture that greeted him: Clark sprawled out on the couch, only his head and feet visible. Considering the possibility that he was asleep, Lex stopped at the top step, and murmured his name.

Clark craned his head to look back, illuminated with a brilliant smile. "Lex, hey..."

No matter how the rest of his day went, Lex could almost always count on Clark being happy to see him. A little thing, a hello with a smile like that, helped wash away tension, and Lex waved a hand to let Clark wallow in peace. The floor was fine. Lex sank down to sit with his back against the couch, brushing a hand over his head and settling in.

"I missed you at the party," Clark said.

Lex glanced back at him. Seventeen today, Clark looked much younger kicked back with a plate of cake and an air of festive satisfaction, which was new.

"I stopped by earlier, but you were busy." From what Lex had seen, more than busy- he'd stayed long enough to see Clark trying to jolly a smile out of Chloe, and decided that discretion was the better part of valor. Lex knew how Jonathan would look at him, how Pete would avoid him, and with Chloe short-circuiting, more stress was the last thing Clark needed at his own birthday party. Lex casually blamed it on himself. "Long day. I wasn't in the mood to make small talk with your parents and their friends."

Clark squinted at him with a faint smile. "I thought you were always up for showing off your charm." Shifting onto his elbow, he teased. "You know, snaring people into your web..."

"Only when there's something in it for me." Glancing back again, Lex let the joking fade, marking a line between it and sincerity. "I did want to wish you a happy birthday."

Perpetually eager, Clark encouraged him with a nod. "You still can."

"But it's not your birthday, anymore." He wanted to see how Clark could cast optimism on that.

He did it with the same easy smile as before, shrugging a little. "It is in Alaska."

Checking his watch, Lex tended a small smile, marveling at an enthusiasm that extended to marking off the end of a birthday in all time zones. He set his watch to commemorate Juneau's coming midnight. "But only for a few more minutes." He reached into his pocket, squeezing the awkwardly-shaped package before offering it up. "I guess I should give this to you before it's too late."

"Thanks, Lex."

Lex could hear him turning it over in his hands, the distinctive crackle of tape and paper being manipulated. "Happy birthday, Clark."

Shifting behind him, Clark shook the box a little and asked, "Did you eat at the party?"

"I didn't stay very long."

"You want some cake? My mom made it, it's really good. Chocolate with peanut butter icing."

And in spite of a long and pleasant relationship with peanut butter cups, Lex couldn't help but wince. "How can I refuse?"

The words barely out of his mouth, Lex found himself in possession of a slightly used piece of cake. Sometimes, being friends with Clark was as easy as second grade- want to see my frog? Want a piece of gum? That kind of easy generosity seemed foreign to Lex, and he played with the piece of cake as he mulled the sensation. He took too long to say something, and Clark shifted into solicitous mode- offering another piece of cake, a new one.

Mostly, Lex wanted him to open his present, so he cut off a dark, sticky slice of cake and took a bite. It didn't taste a thing like peanut butter cups, but it wasn't bad. "Perfect." Relieved when Clark laughed, Lex put the fork aside. "I think this is the first time I've seen you willingly give up food."

Clark launched into a recitation of his grazing habits during the day, interrupted when Lex leaned his head back to ask, "So how does it feel to be seventeen?"

Pondering this question, Clark turned the box over in his hands. "I don't know. Not very different from sixteen, so far." He shook the box a little, smiling at its obscure rattle. "Only, you know, more presents and cake."

The alarm on Lex's watch bleated, and he reset it with a rueful smile. "Your birthday's over. Even in Alaska."

Clark looked past him. "Yeah."

"Now you just have the rest of the year to get through." Seventeen could be awkward, worse than sixteen because in that year, at least, everyone expected you to screw up. It was a year to sample new experiences, to fail. People were less forgiving with seventeen, it was the dawn of 'old enough to know better.'

Quiet too long, Lex looked back to catch Clark with his eyes closed, an arm curled beneath his head. Moonlight couldn't leach the color from Clark- he was perpetually vivid, dark hair on pale-gold skin, scarlet flannel and a soft pink mouth- no wonder Chloe wanted to fight with him; when Clark got angry, he stood too close and put all of his colors on display. Lex could tell from his uneven breath that he wasn't asleep. "Clark? Are you all right?"

Lashes fluttering open, Clark looked sleepy and startled all at once. "Sorry. It's just late. Long day."

Nodding, Lex caught the edge of the couch and stood. "You're right. I should probably go."

"No. Stay." The please was implied, written in big green eyes turned up to implore as Clark rolled to sit on the edge of the couch. "I haven't opened your present yet."

Lex glanced down, seeing the box dwarfed in Clark's hands. With a more critical eye, he examined all the flaws in the wrapping, only looking up when Clark spoke again.

"Besides, I've never been seventeen before. You could give me some pointers."

Don't get caught with two ounces of pot in your glove box, don't sleep with girls who don't speak English... Lex seriously doubted that his pointers for navigating seventeen would apply, but he sat down anyway. "I don't know that I'd make a good role model, but go ahead. Open your present."

Grinning, Clark started to tug at the paper, jerking his head up when Lex grabbed his wrist.

"I just want you to know that if you tell me you can't accept this, those are reasonable grounds to punch you as hard as I can." He was mostly kidding, but Clark looked like he was actually considering this possibility. "Clark?"

Finally, Clark nodded. "Okay. That's fair."

Relaxing next to him, Lex watched him strip away thick scotch tape and paper beneath; he smiled a little at Clark's befuddled smile when he lifted the pendant from the box.

"You got me a necklace?" The dubious note in Clark's voice carried in the relative quiet of the loft.

"A pendant, actually. Saint John the Baptist, patron of bird dealers and Quebec. Your guess is as good as mine." Lex glanced over, reading the polite, quizzical curiosity knitting Clark's brow, and continued. "I got it on my seventeenth birthday. It seemed appropriate somehow."

Hooking the chain over his thumb, Clark let the pendant dangle down in front of his face. His eyes crossed a little then straightened, mapping the worn surface of the pendant. It caught the light and diffused it, paling a small spot on Clark's cheek where it reflected. "Who was it from?"

"My father. It's not what he intended to give me..." Lex trailed off, flattening his mouth, feeling Clark looking at him, through him, waiting for the explanation. "He left a car in the driveway, and had his secretary sign a card for him."

Clark's gaze wavered, back to the pendant. "This isn't a car."

Lex shook his head. "I crashed the car. And then I broke into my father's room, and took my mother's necklace." He didn't remember most of that night, wasted in bars, with people he didn't really want to remember, but he could still feel the cold wash of his mother's jewelry on the tips of his fingers. "Dad was in Switzerland, I didn't think he'd mind if I replaced the gift I'd broken."

Slipping the pendant back in the box, Clark pursed his lips.

"Was he mad?"

"Probably." Rubbing his hands together, Lex turned to Clark with a smile. He'd never have a seventeen like that, he already hadn't. "I wanted her with me, and I think she would have liked you. I know it's not a car, but..."

"No, that's okay." Clark closed the box and slipped it into his shirt pocket. "I like it, thank you."

Rubbing a hand against Clark's arm, Lex started to stand again. "It's getting late. I should go." He wasn't surprised when Clark rose to follow him- Clark had good manners, but the gentle touch trailing down the back of his shirt was a little unusual. Lex looked back, and looked up into all of Clark's colors- dark and light, vibrant and pastel, and just as close as he'd been standing to Chloe- he'd been right, it was a good view. "Clark?"

"I'm sorry you were alone on your birthday." Hesitant, Clark managed to lean forward in increments, stirring electricity in the air. "I'm glad you were here for mine."

Carpe diem was a way of life for Lex. He knew he should pull away, but he didn't. What was a kiss, one chocolate sweet kiss in the middle of the night? When Clark pulled back, Lex rolled his mouth, still tasting him there- something precious and perfect, that better judgment told him to ruin as quickly as possible. "Clark, have you been drinking?"

"What? No!" Straightening up, Clark moved out of Lex's orbit, shaking his head. "My dad let me have part of a beer, but that was six or seven hours ago."

Lex wanted to laugh, because he'd said it just to divert him. He hadn't figured masculine, midwestern bonding rituals into the equation- he couldn't ever remember a time when there wasn't a little something in his wine glass at dinner.

"Look, it's late. You're tired..." He couldn't help the thin laugh this time. " You're straight. I'm going to go, Clark. We'll forget this ever happened."

"No."

Taking a step down, Lex frowned. "No, what?"

"No to all of it." Though fixed in place, Clark was moving. A faint quaver in his shoulders, his fingers stretching and folding over nothing. "I'm not a little kid."

Lex slipped his hands into his pockets. "That's really a matter of opinion, isn't it?"

New light blazed to life on Clark's features, anger and embarrassment tangled up in a single blush. "You don't talk to me like I'm a kid. You don't look at me like I'm a kid."

Which was the truth, and arguing the point would hurt him more than silently agreeing.

"You're my best friend, Lex." Clark searched his face, and he stepped down twice, to make them the same height. "I trust you."

Parting his lips, it took Lex a moment to think of something to say. The very best lies, he knew, were the ones the liar truly believed. Lex could separate ulterior motive from genuine affection, but Clark didn't deal well with dichotomy. "You really trust me?"

Confused, Clark seemed to nod and shake his head at once, before settling on the nod. "Yeah."

"Why?" Lex watched the confusion spread, the corners of his soft, sweet mouth tightening, then falling; wheat field eyes looking away, then wandering back.

"Because you want me to."

He didn't want him to. He needed him to, just like he needed him to be happy to see him, just like he needed him to really see all the things Lex had never shown anyone but him. Startling Clark with motion, Lex brushed another kiss against his mouth, then started down the stairs. "Come over later. We'll talk."

-

Lex tried not to count the hours. He tried not to measure time, or listen to the heavy silence blanketing the mansion. He had his usual breakfast alone with the paper, made a few calls to Hong Kong, then checked the Nikkei.

For lunch, he ordered a pizza just because he could, then left it mostly intact on the kitchen table. Picking a book from the library, he carried it to the garden- something nice to look at as he dissected the previous night.

Sunlight fell dappled on the pages, blinding spots to focus on. Clark would never admit he'd been lying, and neither would he. Even if the ages were right, even if he could believe that Clark had always secretly wanted to explore his bisexuality, the foundation was wrong. It would always be wrong.

A shadow fell over his book, and Lex looked up. Haloed in sunlight, Clark's hair looked almost red at the edges.

"Clark. Have a seat."

Coming around, Clark sank down next to him on the bench, stealing a quick glance at the book. If he had something to say, it didn't show on his face.

"You okay?"

The question seemed to snap him out of it, and Clark nodded. "Kind of."

"What's done is done, Clark." Lex laid his thumb in the book, closing the cover on it gently to keep his place. There were things he wanted to know, things he wanted to feel, but he wasn't willing to risk the collateral damage to a rare friendship to get to them. "If you walk away right now, no one will ever know. Things will be awkward for a while, but we'll get over it."

Setting his mouth into a line, Clark shifted uncomfortably. "What if I don't want that?"

There it was, a little unknowing glimmer of hope, and Lex answered with a flat smile. "Tell me everything. I'll do the same. And if that goes well, we can talk about the rest."

Clark created his own shadows. Lex watched them pour across Clark's eyes, sneaking into the lines that smoothed together to make up his features, and he could hear his own heart beating, hard and slow. They could still walk away from this- probably a little more wary, a lot more careful to avoid those moments when they'd have to lie- but it was possible.

After an interminable silence, Clark swallowed hard and finally, finally held Lex's gaze.

"Where do you want me to start?"

The End

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to their owners/creators/copyright holders. This fan-written fiction intends no infringement on any copyrights.