w h a t . f r i e n d s . a r e . f o r

What Friends Are For
[by victoria p.]

Rating: G

Summary: Adam is a good friend.

Notes: Thanks as always to Jen, Pete/Melissa, Dot, and Meg. written for tenderamaltheia, who requested "Pepper, pregnancy test, rage."

Date: April 27, 2004

Adam is used to Pepper's moods, but she's in a really vicious temper as she stalks through the grass that morning.

"What's got your knickers in a twist?" he asks when he thinks it's safe to speak, which is after she's done tearing the leaves off every branch within her reach, and stripping the ground bare of what little grass remains in their hideout.

Pepper growls and Dog hides behind Adam. Adam doesn't blame him.

"My mum's sprogged up."

Adam blinks.

"Isn't she too old?"

"That's what I thought, but I found the pregnancy test in the garbage, and then she and Dad sat me down for A Talk."

Adam shudders, remembering The Talk his parents had with him recently about Girls and Other Things he would never tell Pepper he's interested in, because she might kill him; things like the way her breasts -- which appeared out of nowhere a few weeks ago -- bounce when they ride their bikes, and how his stomach does a little flip when Sally Weathers smiles at him.

"They're all excited about the new baby. They say it wasn't planned, but aren't the best things in life a surprise? Stupid rubbishy surprises. Nobody likes them." She sounds disgusted and shoots a look at him, daring him to disagree. He doesn't.

She throws herself to the ground beside him, and he forces himself not to stare at her breasts, or her hair, which flies all over and smells clean and like some kind of flowers. She keeps threatening to cut it all off and he keeps distracting her when the idea comes up. He likes her hair, imagines touching it sometimes, and when he does, he also imagines she won't black his eye for it, like she did to Jonathan Grimes last week when he said she had nice tits.

He lies beside her, and they stare up at the white, fluffy clouds.

"If you want me to, I could probably--" he says, wrinkling his nose at the idea, but willing to do it for her if she wants.

She turns her head to face him, and instead of horror, he sees resignation. "No. No. I thought about it, but no."

"Okay."

Her hand is only centimeters from his on the scraggly grass; he reaches out and, holding his breath and thinking of an excuse that doesn't involve wanting to touch her in case she snarls at him for it, slips his hand against hers. Her fingers curl around his hand, and he sighs in contentment.

"But you have to help change the nappies," she says eventually.

He nods. That's what friends are for.

end

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Disclaimer: All Good Omens characters belong Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, etc. This piece of fan-written fiction intends no infringement on any copyrights.